If love can be booked

Chapter 208 In the elevator, Shen Wanning met Lu Jinchuan again and was rejected

I haven't taken the elevator for a long time. At the stairs, I imagined that he would pass by.

One day, two days... How many days had passed? She waited silently, as if time had stopped at this moment.

She knew that he always had the habit of taking the stairs. The laughter and joy they once shared on the stairs still lingered in her ears clearly. However, she could no longer find that familiarity and warmth. Who once said that as long as you look up at the sky, your tears will not fall easily? But now it seems that all this is just a lie. She had promised not to cry anymore, but the tears still rolled in her eyes uncontrollably.

I promised not to cry...

I am just an ordinary woman who longs for happiness! I keep the love he gives me and interpret the meaning of love.

The night wind blew by, bringing a hint of coolness, gently caressing her cheeks. However, she could not feel the warmth of his presence at all, and even the traces he had left behind seemed to have gradually dissipated. He slowly disappeared before her eyes, as if he had never appeared, and the dreamlike memories of the past also disappeared without a trace.

Lin Xiaoxi's words in the afternoon echoed in his heart. It's not that he didn't feel touched, and it's not that he hasn't thought about starting over, but can they really start over again?

For a long time, he forgot her and everything between them. But she always held on to the long gone past and refused to let go, stubbornly staying in every corner where they had walked hand in hand, closing her eyes and trying to imagine how they had been together in the past. Holding the memories, she wandered at the intersection where they parted, not daring to move forward, afraid of getting lost, too afraid of losing someone. The fear of losing someone followed her like a shadow, gradually swallowing her up, so that even the clear self became blurred.

The doctor's words still linger in my ears. The patient may have selective amnesia, on the one hand, because he himself does not want to remember, because this information is irrelevant to the patient; on the other hand, it may be because the memory is too heavy and the patient cannot bear it, thus leading to selective amnesia.

And his inability to remember was because her weight was insignificant or because it was too much to bear?

Jinchuan, you deliberately forgot me, right? Because I can't remember what I once did. But, Jinchuan, how can I give up? I remember what you said, loving you hurts my heart. It would be great if I could forget too, learn to forget, but tears are sliding down my cheeks uncontrollably.

At the staircase, a delicate figure was reflected. She was waiting for him. He knew it all along, but he just didn't pass by her. He avoided her. He didn't want to see her, not because he hated her, but because he was afraid that she would look for her in him. Although he didn't like her, her tears always touched his heart and hurt him. He wanted to hug her tightly in his arms and give her warmth and comfort.

She cried again...

Her eyes are red. When will she be happier?

Finally seeing him, he looked a little annoyed. He didn't like her crying, she knew. But every time her eyes touched his familiar figure, tears would pour out like a broken dam, even if she only saw his blurry back in the distance. Perhaps it was because she had been sitting for a long time, when she stood up suddenly, she suddenly felt a strong sense of dizziness, and the world in front of her seemed to start spinning...

I have been in a bad mental state recently, often feeling dizzy and having a poor appetite. I always thought it was because I was too tired, too stressed out, and didn't get enough rest.

"What are you doing here?" Lu Jinchuan asked expressionlessly, his voice as cold as the wind in the cold night. It wasn't that he did it on purpose, but every time he saw her haggard face, he would involuntarily surge with a nameless fire in his heart, so that even his tone of voice became stiff and indifferent unconsciously.

"I... I'm waiting for you to get off work." Hearing his cold tone, she couldn't help but be slightly startled, and a little regretful. Why did she wait for him? He had never spoken to her in this tone before.

Eliminate the longing in your heart, at least don't think of him in front of him. The longing is too heavy, too embarrassing, because he doesn't care. Why is it that the same face is two different people? She thought that the Lu Jinchuan she fell in love with must not be him.

"You have three minutes." For nearly a month, she always appeared and disappeared without warning. But no matter how she did it, it was not the way I liked, especially when I saw her eyes full of tears, it was even more annoying. Maybe it was because of time, I gradually stopped resisting and resenting her appearance as I did at the beginning, and sometimes I couldn't help but think: In what strange and special way did she quietly walk into my originally peaceful life journey? In my memory, she never seemed to smile. Was she so depressed in the past?

"Ah?" She raised her head suddenly and instantly fell into his eyes as deep as a cold pond. Three minutes?

"Two minutes." Lu Jinchuan turned his head slightly, glanced at her casually, and spoke slowly. His tone was so calm that it seemed as if he was just stating a very ordinary fact.

"You're going too fast." Hearing this, Shen Wanning couldn't help but reveal a hint of laughter and tears. Is this the legendary Lu Jinchuan style? Seeing him stride forward and step into the elevator, Shen Wanning jogged and followed him all the way.

When she followed Lu Jinchuan into the elevator, she suddenly felt an inexplicable tension surge in her heart. After all, it had been a long time since she was alone in a room with him like this, and this enclosed space made her feel a little uneasy.

As if he had noticed something strange about Shen Wanning, Lu Jinchuan raised the corner of his mouth slightly, and slowly approached her with a half-smile on his face.

"Are you afraid of me?" Lu Jinchuan's deep and magnetic voice rang in Shen Wanning's ears. At this moment, he was only a few feet away from Shen Wanning, and he could even clearly feel each other's breathing. Faced with such a close contact, Shen Wanning dared not look up at him, and could only stammer in response: "No...no."

Lu Jinchuan did not embarrass her, but just looked at her closely. He could not help but wonder in his heart: What is so good about her? Why can he indulge her so much? The various furnishings and daily necessities in the house revealed traces that she had lived here, and it was obvious that she had lived here for a long time. Those familiar yet unfamiliar objects seemed to be silently telling stories of the past.

"Are...are you okay?" Shen Wanning's heart couldn't help but beat fast as she hadn't seen the man in front of her for a long time. She asked with a slightly trembling voice.

"Do you think I'm okay?" Lu Jinchuan did not answer her question directly, but asked back with a slight smile on his face.

Hearing his question, Shen Wan Ning was stunned at first, then nodded gently and replied, "Okay." How could he be bad? She was the bad one, because she had memories, unlike him, who didn't remember anything and could take it for granted.

"I think I'll be better off without you around to bother me." Lu Jinchuan looked at the familiar yet unfamiliar figure in front of him and said this involuntarily. However, he felt a little regretful as soon as he said it. In an instant, he saw her originally bright eyes gradually dim, as if the light was covered by dark clouds.

"I'll be better without you?" She murmured to herself, her voice as light as a leaf in the wind. This sentence was like a sharp sword, ruthlessly piercing all the beautiful fantasies in her heart. Her eyes were moistened instantly, but she tried hard to hold back the tears. What you said was always the same, what you said was that you would love me forever, what you said was that you were my only one. They were all lies.

"Yes, I'm sorry. I..." She choked and tried to explain something, but found that any words were superfluous at this moment. She clearly understood that he didn't need her apology, he just wanted her to disappear from his sight as soon as possible. Tears fell, just because he didn't need it.

"I didn't mean it." She whispered, as if she was talking to the air. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disrupt your life. But do you still remember? You said I'm not allowed to cry in a place without you, and I'm not allowed to think about you secretly. I'm used to having you, how can you bear to let me be lonely?

Seeing the tears in her eyes, Lu Jinchuan felt extremely regretful. He felt an indescribable helplessness deep in his heart, and kept asking himself why he said such hurtful words.

He was unwilling to admit that she had affected him so deeply, fearing that this emotion would disturb his originally peaceful life. Therefore, he could only choose to respond to her with indifference and determination, trying to drive her out of his world.

"What did I do wrong? Why do you hate me so much?" she asked in a crying voice.

"I am willing to change... no matter what, I am willing to change... I just ask you not to ignore me anymore. I am really afraid that you will ignore me..." She burst into tears, her body trembling slightly because of extreme sadness. Can you please not ignore me?

Faced with her desperate plea, his heart could not help but ripple. However, reason told him not to be soft-hearted. He gritted his teeth and said coldly: "Okay, let me ask you, what did you do right?" Right and wrong, can they be clearly distinguished? He did not reject her, he did not love her, he could obviously have no feelings for her. But every time she appeared, she could easily stir his heartstrings, making his heart, which he thought was as solid as a rock, begin to waver.

"I have the courage to face it. I won't evade or run away. Unlike some people, I use amnesia as an excuse to escape. I work hard to pursue the love that belongs to me. Is there anything wrong with that?" Shen Wanning was angry about his amnesia, and even more angry that he forgot her so easily. How could he do that? How could he do that?

"Yes. The love you pursue is not love." Lu Jinchuan responded expressionlessly.

However, his next words hit Shen Wanning's heart like a heavy hammer, "The essence of true love is that when I look into your eyes, I can clearly see the real me in your pupils, just like the brightest and most dazzling star in the night sky."

"Don't you feel tired of you appearing in front of me all the time like this? I don't like it. It's very annoying." He didn't like looking at her resentful eyes.

"You look at me every day with eyes that say I've done something wrong to you. I've had enough. You are nobody to me." He yelled in frustration, but he was at a loss. He didn't know what went wrong, and she always looked at him as if he owed her something, which made him upset. Seeing her cry also made him feel distressed.

"If I really loved you so much before, why can't I remember anything?" Lu Jinchuan could no longer suppress his anger and grievance, and shouted at the top of his lungs. He hated his ignorance at the moment, and he wanted more than anyone else to find back the lost past and figure out what happened between them. But no matter how hard he tried to recall, his mind was still blank, and he couldn't remember anything. This feeling of powerlessness almost swallowed him up.

"Why did you forget me? How could you do this when I remembered you?" She asked with tears in her eyes, her voice trembling. Why did things turn out like this? How did they become like this? Was he punishing her for not remembering her?

"That's because I don't love you. I've never loved you." Don't love? Lu Jinchuan, who are you kidding? If you don't love, seeing her sad eyes, would you want to hold her in your arms? If you don't love, would you want to keep her by your side at all costs, even in this way? If you don't love, would you want to quarrel with her just to make her remember him? If you don't love, seeing her tearful eyes, would you want to kiss her fiercely? Lu Jinchuan, why do you have to deceive yourself like this? Does your heart hurt?

"I'm sorry... I won't bother you anymore." Before she finished speaking, tears were already streaming down her cheeks like a flood. Yes, just as he said, it turned out that all this was just wishful thinking, and all the efforts were just empty joy in the end. But what was it that she was trying so hard to save? Was it his insignificant pity and sympathy? Or was it his consistent indifference when facing her?

I don't know why, but when I saw Shen Wanning's expression, I felt a little pity in my heart. Heartache, or... something else? Who can tell clearly?

"Perhaps, to you, I am nothing." No one would pay attention to the expression and thoughts of passerby A? Because she is just a passerby A...

"But, to me, you are him."

"But you are not him, you just have the same face." He won't be mean to me, he won't quarrel with me, he won't be unreasonable with me...

"I naively thought that as long as I was by your side all the time, you would definitely think of me." If it were you now, what would happen if you remembered me?

"I was wrong. You can never be him. You won't be him. Because he is not as selfish, cold and ruthless as you." Shen Wanning yelled at the top of her lungs, her voice echoing in the empty corridor, as if to release all the grievances and unwillingness in her heart. Why bother to deceive herself? He has already made it so clear that he doesn't love her and will never love her. What is she still fighting for? What is she still insisting on? Shen Wanning, you are an idiot who despises yourself. She despised herself fiercely and felt extremely disgusted with herself who was now so humble as to be in the dust.

"What did you say?" Lu Jinchuan grabbed her. No one had ever dared to say that to him. Why did she say that? He was cold, selfish, and ruthless?

"Let go, you scoundrel." Shen Wanning struggled desperately, trying to break free from Lu Jinchuan's strong hands. Her heart was beating fast, she was afraid that he would kiss her desperately like he did in the elevator last time; she was also afraid that she would give up resistance and indulge in his arms. After all, she was so attached to his unique scent and taste.

Lu Jinchuan stood there in a daze. Did he just let go? Suddenly, he felt empty inside? Like he had lost something? Just what?

Where is the only thing? Where is the eternity?

You are my one and only, eternal love

You don't know how beautiful this sentence is.

But who can tell me how long this sentence will last?

One second or a world?

Finally, I chose to leave

It's not because I can't ignore your existence in my heart.